what can i do

        sometimes ,i'm serius think about my study,my relationship .
        sometimes,i'm eager for expressing my thought in English.
        but,actually,i'm afriad i can not write a fine English diary because my poor grammar,terrible spelling.
        however,sometimes,i'd like to express my mood,idea in English.so i still care ..just like standing in crossroad. 

        from words,phrases to sentences and grammar,i 'm involved in judgeing of  standardization what is right and what is wrong.
       
        what can i do ....